Seeing Conflict as Opportunity
In any close or intimate relationship, we are bound to experience conflict. We often feel scared or anxious as soon as we experience conflict in a relationship. But conflict can teach us so much about ourselves and the other person we are in relationship. It can help deepen our understanding of what is happening inside of us, such as what we may be needing, and what the other person may need as well. Conflict can become an opportunity to learn to better love the person we are in relationship with over time. It can be that next step in the relationship that can help deepen the relationship and trust in the relationship, or it can also be a turning point where one or both individuals may decide to deflect responsibility or not respond to the needs of the relationship due to the fear and anxiety. We can choose how we want to handle the conflicts in our relationships. Try engaging the conflict differently and see how it influences the outcome.
Hatty J. Lee, LMFT (she/her) is an Asian American licensed marriage and family therapist and brainspotting practitioner who has been practicing for 14 years in community mental health settings, schools, and private practice virtually across California and in-person in Los Angeles and Pasadena, California. As the founder and clinical director of a group practice called Oak and Stone Therapy in Los Angeles, CA, she trains clinicians and supports people to deepen their relationship with themselves and the most important people in their lives. She writes about mental health on her Instagram and is the co-author of The Indwell Guide that integrates visual storytelling, mental health education, and practical tools to support people to heal and thrive.
